Nick and I are rounding the final turn toward celebrating our sixth wedding anniversary....It really does feel like we were planning our day just yesterday. At the same time, it also seems like we've been together forever, when really it's just been 7 years. I've been doing a lot of redecorating lately, and coming across wedding photos, momentos and odds and ends from our big day.

Between these quick jaunts down memory lane, and the fact that I started shooting weddings again last year, I decided it's time for some unsolicited wedding planning advice, from the perspective of someone who didn't exactly LOVE their day. I loved a lot of parts of it, but I do wish some things had been different. We all get told the true but cliche "It's about the marriage not the wedding". Ok, but - the wedding is really important too!

I can't wait to hear if anyone else has some great Out-Of-The-Trenches advice for brides to be, leave yours in the comments!

1. The Guest List: We ended up with about 200 people on our list. Which was absurd now that I'm looking back. SO MANY guests were invited out of obligation (ah-hem, Nick's ex!). Your wedding day is not about obligations and extended family. It's about you and your spouse. I tell everyone I know that is wedding planning to use my Chicken Soup Rule: If the person you're inviting wouldn't bring you chicken soup when you're sick, they don't need to be a part of your day.
2. The Memories: Blow your budget right here and just serve appetizers if you have to. We had a phenomenal photographer, I don't regret that decision one little bit. I do regret not having video taken by a professional. I'd have traded the candy-bar for a videographer in a heartbeat. I didn't think about how precious those memories would be so soon. However, between my dad's accident and the loss of Nick's Papa, my nephew Cameron, my Godfather Wally and our dear friend Kyle - I really wish I had video dancing with them and watching them enjoy the day. 
3. The Seating Chart: This is a very controversial topic. Some hate them, some believe it's an Emily Post staple of a civilized soiree. I'm a modern girl, but I champion the chart. Hear me out before you groan; this is the ONE TIME you need to think of your guests' comfort. Not everyone can breeze into a room and feel welcome with strangers, striking up conversation with ease. Strategic placement of guests makes for a much merrier celebration. Whatever you do, don't sit your great aunt too far from your parents. YOU may have her waning eyesight in mind, she'll just be offended. (Not that I know from experience) Bonus Tip: Write each guest's name on a clothespin with a ultra fine Sharpie, and put table numbers on paper plates. Move the pins around on plates until you have a layout that works best for you. Amazon carries them, but Dollar Tree or Walmart may be cheaper.
4. The Favors: The only people that touched our candy bar were our nieces, nephews and children of our friends. That's it. Just skip the favors, most are not even taken home. If you MUST though, don't waste too much time and money personalizing them. Nobody is keeping the sticker at the bottom of the Hershey's Kiss.
5. Unplugged Ceremonies: I am on this island alone as a photographer, but maybe skip the snarky "keep your phone away" signs. I had a friend have a fairy tale of a wedding day. Hired a reputable photographer, but their memory card failed. A lot of the photos they ended up with came from guests. As a photographer, I don't mind tapping someone on the shoulder to get them out of my way. I even make little whispers to assumed troublesome guests ahead of time "I'll probably stand right about here for x shot, but you're welcome to get behind me to snap a few!" I have no shame, I'm being paid big money to be bold and deliver photos.
6. Traditions: This one is short and sweet. Traditions don't mater if they aren't special to YOU.
7. Take a Minute, or 15: It is YOUR day. Yours. PLEASE take a few minutes to go soak in everything. Stand off to a corner while everyone is busy eating. Go take some just the two of you photos while the cake is being cut. Go hide before the reception in a quiet room - they can't start without you!
8. Photos of Guests: I really wish we'd done a receiving line from the cocktail hour to the reception, and gotten photos with everyone going from the first room to the 2nd. It would have been time consuming, but I'd love to have that.
9. Getting Ready Space: Consider lighting when choosing where to get ready. My dad "picked me up" from a classroom off the church gym and the lighting was horrid. Give your bridesmaids nice totes to keep their things in, this will keep your getting ready space clear for photos, and tidy to help with "cleaning" stress"
10. EAT BREAKFAST: I called my sister a bitch. Well I called her a F*ing Bitch because she started well-meaning lecturing me about not having breakfast that day. Obviously, she was right I was crabby because I'd not eaten since having popcorn at the movies the night before, I'm pretty sure I didn't eat anything at the Rehearsal either. I'll never not be sorry for being so cruel to her, hangry or not. And she was so right - I should have eaten.

I'd love to hear tips from other experienced brides! What was your big day blunder that you wish you'd done differently? Or the best advice someone gave you?